Is someone in your life or work making you crazy? Are you doing your very best to resolve the situation but getting no results?
There’s actually a secret to getting what you want. Read on and see if you can break the code yourself:
He says: I’m recognized nationally for my innovative approaches, but she never seems to appreciate my ideas. She treats me like I’m an interruption.
She says: He just doesn’t get what it takes to run a back office. We have systems and procedures and his team are like tumbleweeds.
He says: I know how hard she works and so I praise her and show appreciation, but it doesn’t seem to matter.
She says: I try to make things so easy to do with check-lists, I train everybody, and he just ignores all we do.
He says: Regardless of what I do, she never shows me any appreciation.
She says: Regardless of what I do, he doesn’t respect our processes.
What does he want most? Praise and appreciation.
What does she want most? Order and predictability.
Notice what they are giving each other?
You got it. They are each giving the other what they most want themselves! So when you find yourself locked in a no-win with someone in your life, pay attention to what the other person is offering you – then give them that back. Not just once, but over and over.
Start experimenting and let me know how it goes.
Until next Tuesday – Elizabeth